i know there's alot to fix

i need to get something off my chest ...

2009-12-16T20:43:00.003-05:00

I struggle. I have a battle that is a constant in my life & effects a good portion of it. It frustrates me all the time, and even when I think I've over come it, it always comes back to haunt me.

Procrastination. There I said it. Now you know. I hope this doesn't change your opinion of me, I swear I am trying to break the cycle. I found this article on the subject & even procrastinated reading it! That's when I laughed at myself & realized I had a problem! But today, or tonight I guess, I am here to kick it in the butt & do what I want to do. Time is my friend & I am choosing to use it wisely!

Now what does that mean to you?

Ok, so here is the deal. Hampton (the bff) & I have decided to attempt blogging together. We have talked, IMed, texted, & even registered for a blogspot but I procrastinated on posting over there. Don't ask me why, but I think we have a good thing going & this is a fun way for us to keep up with each other & share our internet finds. (which is alot!)

So head on over to ANAM CARA, which mean "Soul Friend" in Gaelic. I will update here every so often but mostly over there from now on. No worries, you'll love it over there too & I don't want you to miss out on all the goodness!

Now do what you have to, bookmark it, follow either of us on Twitter to get updates, or add it to your RSS Feed, but head on over! My first post is all about those Christmas Cookies!

http://my-anam-cara.blogspot.com/

--------------
Now Playing: Dashboard Confessional - "Even Now"

christmas cookies

2009-12-04T21:58:00.007-05:00

i think i am going to start a tradition. (which goes against anything james ever taught me! ha!) i did this last year & i feel the need (for speed? not quite) to make some family traditions for pete & i. even though it is only the 2 of us, we are a family & everything gets better as time goes on right?! last year because funds were low to purchased everyone we wanted a gift, and even though i love gift giving i am a horrible procrastinator & end up missing out on what i really wanna give someone. but cookies keep me on track (must be because i have a huge sweet tooth) & you have to get them done before they are done! so, again this year, and here on after i will be giving the gift of baked goods!

sadly, i put a shout out to my friends & family on facebook for some good, shipping friendly cookie recipes & i didn't get a one. come on guys! really?! so i did the work this evening (trying to keep quite so pete could sleep) & found some amazing recipes. i wish i could make them all, and maybe some of them are a little ambitious, but i am determined!
** EDIT: my dear friend April did pull through for me, at least some one pays attention to my updates! haha kidding!

how could you not start off with a classic, chocolate chip cookies!

my love of red velvet in cookie form, red velvet black & white cookies.

these aren't necessarily very christmas-y, but oh man, when i came acrossed these i just had to share! penguins hockey jerseys, sugar cookie style.

my brother johnny loves anything & everything peanut butter (but who doesn't right? oh, wait grandma b doesn't! haha) so he is easy to bake for because him & pete both love peanut butter. peanut butter cookies with chocolate chips.

while i do not share my dad's love of oatmeal raisin cookies, its always a good bet that he would love a batch of these!

grandma b does not understands pete's love for the combination of chocolate & peanut butter. maybe its just a generation thing, but she thinks it's gross. however, grandma b is a woman after my own heart & loves coconut. so i think these coconut butter thins will be perfect for her. (& me!)

my mama is the ultimate chocoholic, better than brownies chocolate cookies is right up her ally.

ok, ok so caramels aren't exactly cookies, but candy is always a good gift in my mind. i think its the challenge that enthralls me!

i love toffee! i couldn't pass up chocolate toffee cookies, mmmhmmm.

every year pete's mom made him 7 layer cookies and since she has passed i have filled in for that duty. they have many different names, magic bars, hello dolly bars, but in our apartment they are 7 layer cookies. so in her memory for both pete & i, i make them every year.

of course 10 recipes aren't sufficient for me, so here are some other tempting cookie/bar recipes. maybe this year you can start your own family tradition! what are some of the things that your family does for the holidays?! any good recipes?! hopefully i can get a better response then i did on facebook, haha kidding :)

peanut butter blondies with milk chocolate frosting - oh, you know these melt in your mouth!
chocolate peppermint sandwich cookies - homemade oreos, come on!
lemon rosemary palmiers - for a different take on sweet, & a versatile recipe.
chocolate hazelnut biscotti - for the coffee lover in your life.
snickerdoodles - holiday classic.
lemon bars - i love anything lemon, & its something alittle different then the overload of chocolate for the holidays
cheesecake-marbled brownies - my boss loves anything cheesecake, i might have to surprise her with some of these.
the famed neiman marcus cookie - get high class at home!
almond macaroons fill with nutella - anything with nutella, sign me up!
chocolate-dipped coconut macaroons - again, i love coconut.

**All recipes and photos via/copyright their respective blog sources**

--------------
Now Playing: The Used - Blue & Yellow

"who i am & who i wanna be"

2009-12-03T21:55:00.005-05:00

hello?! anyone out there?! y'all still reading?! i can't believe that november has come and gone! there is so much i want & need to share.

so hello decemeber! my my, what a year it has been, but good thing the year isn't over just yet!

it may seem alittle early to start talking about what we are hopeful for in 2010, and i am in no way wishing my life away but i am excited for a fresh start. this year has had many twist and turns, regrets, triumphs, and all that falls in between. i feel like i have learned so much about myself and i am ready to make good on that knowledge.

reading through the many blogs i follow, a common theme for the last week or so has been "what are we thankful for?" & even though it may seem generic to name off the norm, family, friends, faith, and so on, it is all very true for me. i often miss what is right in front of my face & take for granted the amazing things i already have. i've always been a dreamer, never really realistic (at all!) & even though i might come off as very mature, i feel like man?! i am i really an adult?! i am sure this is all something that we go though at one time or another, i guess this is my time.

not sure that all makes sense, but i feel a bit of peacefulness for getting it out. i am happy. i am lucky. and i am blessed. thanks for reading & some super cool stuff coming up soon! xoxo

--------------
Now Playing: The O.C. Supertones - "In Between"

view from heaven

2009-11-02T21:24:00.004-05:00

it's hard to believe it's been 2 years. i hope you know we miss you so much & love you with all our hearts. can't wait to see you again <3

And I'm sure the view from heaven
Beats the hell out of mine from here
And if we all believe in heaven
Maybe we'll make it through one more year
Down here

I hope that all is well in heaven
'cause it's all a shot to hell down here
I hope that I find you in heaven
'cause I'm so lost without you down here

You won't be coming back
And I didn't get to say goodbye
I really wish I got to say goodbye

Yellowcard - "View From Heaven"

"sing a long goodnight"

2009-11-01T12:55:00.001-05:00

next up! was a recipe i got from my sweet dear friend, april. she calls is "April's Ginger Apple Crumb Pie" & it is mmmmmmm gooooood! it is a super easy recipe and the end result was just perfect. pete said it was his favorite.

here is her recipe ...

April's Ginger Apple Crumb Pie
1 pie crust
1/2 cup of butter, cut into small pieces
3/4 cup flour
3/4 cup sugar
about 5 apples (pre soaked in pineapple juice)
1 tablespoon grated fresh ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt

preheat oven to 375

in a food processor pulse the butter, flour, and 1/4 cup of sugar until forms large clumps. put in a bowl and put in the fridge until your ready to use it.
toss the apples, ginger, cinnamon, salt, remaining 1/2 cup of sugar and 1 tablespoon of flour.
transfer apple mixture into the crust, sprinkle the crumb topping and bake until the top is golden and the apples are soft. (about 55-60 minutes)

the only thing i did different, was i added a 1/2 cup of brown sugar, and chopped pecans to the crumb mixture just because i had some extras. i even took a slice to work and it was perfect at room temperature. thank you to my lovely april for sharing some amazing recipes.

i still have a few apples left, & i'm not sure what i might make next. hell! maybe i'll eat one just as is.

--------------
Now Playing: The Get Up Kids - "Long Goodnight"

"I don't know why it is, isn't it obvious to me?"

2009-10-31T12:40:00.000-04:00

the first thing i made with my apple pickings was Sticky Spiked Double Apple Cake with a Brown Sugar Brandy Sauce. (whew that's quite the title) although the recipe looks some what difficult i found it fairly easy & i even made a few changes. i didn't use brandy or raisins for the simple fact that i didn't have any. in replace of the brandy i use apple juice & instead of using the dried apple pieces i just made up for it by using the fresh apples i had. either way i think this cake would have turned out just as amazing! i love recipes that you can customize to your preferences and needs.

the cake to me was almost brownie like, it had a crunchy outside with a warm chewy inside. and the sauce was just the icing on the cake. this would be perfectly paired with ice cream or a tall glass of milk. (or both if you choose!) the making of this cake reminded me alot of the texas sheet cake and i bet i could make a brown sugar brandy version of the icing to top this off too.

i can feel my culinary mind expanding!

--------------
Now Playing: The Get Up Kids - "Sympathy"

farm field trip!

2009-10-29T23:47:00.008-04:00

this past sunday, the crew from work (& respective husbands & boyfriends) went to the farm! we picked apples, took a hayride, picked pumpkins, ate donuts (which i had no idea was part of the experience) & had a blast doing it all! it was nice to get away from make-up (expect the few that wore lashes :P ) & the daily grind of crazy customers.

of course i picked a green pumpkin, that's just how i roll

mostly i was excited about apple picking, there were sooooo many varieties. red delicious, granny smith, fuji, enterprise, roma, ect, ect! i got a few of each & even sampled a few out amongst the beautiful trees. they were all amazing & i couldn't wait to get to baking! (i'll post those later :) )
i feel really blessed to work with such wonderful people. for a good while i was very unhappy in my various job situations but i totally lucked out with my crew! i can honestly say that no matter what, i've made some great life long friends & i feel so lucky to have them apart of my daily life. i've learned & grown so much over the past 2 years & i owe alot of that to them & mac. love you all, xoxo.!

--------------
Now Playing: Yellowcard - "View From Heaven"

"when you slow down all the details spill out"

2009-10-24T09:29:00.001-04:00

it's been a long time since i've heard anyone call me "OC" or outta control. i believe it was james roberts (my youth minister of long ago) that started it, along with some other names i am sure he had for me. it didn't really stick but it was definitely the truth and still is to a certain degree. i have a way of saying the things that other people don't want to say, or don't want me to say! luckily, as i have grown older i have learned (for the most part) & earned the gift of discernment. this memory was brought on by stumbling across this shirt.

Via Threadless Tees

now that to me, is some super cute tech-y humor.
thanks for the memory!

--------------
Now Playing: The Honorary Title - "Accident Prone"

"we all, we all wear dignity"

2009-10-23T10:01:00.000-04:00

i've seen several of the state charm necklaces out & about. i'm not much of a jewelry wearer (mostly i just wear my wedding rings) but i really like the idea of these.

image via ali loves curtis -- necklace via elsabags

not bad for 12 bucks! you can find a few more necklaces here & there. i'm alway alittle nervous about getting jewelry because i have a knack for losing it. i recently lost the pair to my earrings that pete gave me for my birthday a few years ago & i get sick to my stomach when i think about it. i keep hoping that one of the cats just pushed it under something & that i'll find it soon. *crosses fingers*

--------------
Now Playing: Relient K - "The Last, The Lost, The Lease"

keep calm and carry on

2009-10-22T12:55:00.000-04:00

holy smokes! i've never been a calendar person, if there is such a thing. i guess because my folks never hung up a calendar, i never got into the habit myself. but over at DesignCrush they are having a calendar swap (which i'm debating on joining) & a daily round up for some amazing calenders. today i found my favorite! i purchased mine & all i need to do is get some ink to print them & we'll be good to go.

littlebrownpen

there are two different versions, one for women & one for men. they're a pdf file so you can print as many as you like. pete liked the man one so i got it for him to put at his desk. i think i might make some extra copies for work & a few friends. if you aren't familiar with the "keep calm" logo (i guess you would call it that) check it out here.

jennysbakeshop

i would also love to get my hands on one of these bad boys. anything cupcake and i am in! hey christmas is coming up soon *hint* *hint*

--------------
Now Playing: The Get Up Kids - "Sharin' Stone" (daytrotter session)

"there is a holiness to the hearts affections"

2009-10-20T12:47:00.000-04:00

oooooo! i can't wait to see this. i'm never up on new movies (unless there is mad hype about them) but i just saw these amazing photos & watched the trailer for the movie Bright Star. it's about the famous poet John Keats & his love for Fanny Brawne, bring on the tissues. now it is a must see!

Via {frolic!} & Mum and Lark

i always love watching movies from different time periods and im sure this one wont let me down. oooo! can't wait to see it! (just had to say it again)

--------------
Now Playing: Tumbledown - "Movin' On"

"where would you go with a lasso?!"

2009-10-18T18:30:00.008-04:00

it took me a while to get to posting this, laziness is such a curse! (the truth, it's been stupid busy at work, so i've been some what preoccupied -- hello holiday retail season!)

this past tuesday we had a morning meeting for work & to gear up for the holiday season, so i made some festive apple breakfast granola crisp. it was so easy to make, and quite healthy that it just might become a morning stable for pete & i. i didn't take any pictures like planned but i assure you that these pictures are a ton better than my blackberry could ever take.

Via Smitten Kitchen

i ended up doubling the crispy topping because i had such an over flow of apples, but it was so easy i just might end up using it for all my crisps. i used a good mix of different apples & the taste was amazing. it's not super sweet like a dessert so you feel good about having it for breakfast. the best part is that i made it the night before, popped it in the fridge, and it was ready to go for the morning! this recipe will defiantly because a stable for us!

this week while grocery shopping i won a free turkey! so i've already begun planning out my thanksgiving menu! (can you believe its only a month away?!) this year we are having dinner at our apartment, which will be good for me because i wont have to transport all my stuff to my sister-in-laws house, but i'm nervous for my first true holiday at my place. i'm trying to plan early so i don't get stressed out as time moves closer! have you planned anything for the holidays?! any good family recipes to share?! even though i am nervous, i am excited to get cooking!

lastly, i have some blog love. as you know i follow a TON of blogs of all different sorts. one of my recent favorites has been Le Love. the name pretty much says it all, its all about love! the good, the bad, the heartbreaking, and breathtaking. its such a beautiful blog with some great photos that i find myself always right clicking to save.
i love the header because i think it's so cute. but also i'm so curious about washer/dryer combo on the bottom. (i need one!)

Via Le Love

so here is to a great week! be back soon!

--------------
Now Playing: Crystal Castles - "1991"

"& keep your feet on the ground"

2009-10-12T22:25:00.005-04:00

the pass week has been a whirlwind of craziness. my emotions couldn't be any more heighten & i guess i don't really know how to explain it. i know this is rather vague but for the time being it will have to do. (for those that know & read this little space of mine on the interwebs, thank you for all the love & prayers)

but! mixed in with all that life had to throw at me i still managed to get some cooking done! as i type this my index finger is sore because i touched the top of my breakfast apple granola crisp & it burned it slightly. i guess that's what i get for touching it right out of the oven. (i'll share the crisp tomorrow) the week before last i made some amazing chili (pete even said so!). now, i've never followed a chili recipe, partly because you can put in whatever you want, and i love that fact. chili is always a good, cheap and easy meal for me to make for my work lunches. i make a big batch & then divided it up & i'm good for the rest of the week. so i don't have a chili recipe to share, but rather a grand side dish for your own amazing chili. cornbread! since i'm from the south i can't help but love cornbread, especially when it's paired with a nice bowl of chili. but some of the down falls of cornbread is that it can be dry, bland, & flat. well i can tell you my cornbread was anything but. it was light, fluffy, moist, and anything but bland! i found this recipe for cheddar cornbread on smitten kitchen (who just had the most adorable baby, besides zane of course ;) ), and i couldn't wait to try it. the recipe includes cheddar (obviously), cream corn, chili powder, buttermilk and was a cinch to make. (i've officially said my goodbyes to jiffy) i may even alter my mama's cornbread stuffing recipe for thanksgiving because yes, it was that good!

(all packed up & ready for work)

i can't tell you how easy & delicious this cornbread was. there are so many other things you can add to make it your own & taste just the way you like it. so get cracking & make some chili & cornbread!

i'm loving that it is october & the apartment has a chill to it so i can wear my hoodies all day long. i'm hoping to make it to the pumpkin patch & maybe even pick my own apples! the air this time of year is so fresh & amazing. i can honestly say i love living in new jersey for that reason alone. it's nice to have seasons!

--------------
Now Playing: Brand New - "The Quiet Things No One Ever Knows"

Penguin Pride

2009-09-29T21:54:00.008-04:00

i know i have talked about this before but just in case you didnt know ... pete is a huge hockey fan, especially a pittsburgh penguins fan. over the years that we have been together i have fallen in love the with game, and now i am proud to call myself a penguins fan too! the best thing about penguins is that they are so darn cute!

here are some examples,

Sidney Crosby & Evgeni Malkin
(Malkin is cute in that dopey russian sorta way)

not that you can't read, but this is the championship ring the penguins received for winning the stanley cup this year. i think it is rather impressive, alittle much for my taste, but it has a cute quality to it. (haha i am sure thats exactly what the players would say, "cute")

showing some penguin pride at the parade back in june.

these iphone/blackberry cases are insanely adorable. I found these in this delightful Etsy shop, SydneyAngel

(i need to invest in a sewing machine so i can make my own)

i have been searching for something to carry my business cards in and i think i may have found it. i really love this card carrying case. apparently the image of the penguins is a picture taken of some artwork in subway train station in nyc. i've already begun planning a sunday afternoon that pete & i can go on this little adventure. (he doesnt know it yet)

"Penguins Over Dinner"

mari & i spotted this at a thrift store not to long ago. i wish i purchased it when i saw it. so random & cute.

these little guys we saw at the dallas world aquarium we visited while we were on vacation. you'll have to have hampton share her story about these penguins one day!

hockey starts at 3pm on thursday! you can imagine the excitement around our house. last week i ordered the hockey package & ive enjoyed watching some of the pre-season games. here is to a great season! let's go pens!

--------------
Now Playing: Nightmare of You - "Heaven Runs On Oil"

"the truth is i'm to tired to play pretend"

2009-09-28T21:34:00.010-04:00

i have stumbled upon a 4 day weekend! ( a weekend for a the retail employed ) although i could have used this time for a greater purpose, i will not look a gift horse in the mouth (whatever that means) & use this time wisely.

by using my time wisely, what i really mean is wandering the interwebs (which has been slow) for pretty pictures and inspiration for things i really, really want to try. so in order to justify the 2+ hours (now 3+ because of posting this!) i have logged in tonight, i am sharing with you all that i have found. (well mostly all of it)

- via DesignCrush -

how sexy is this tattoo?! i wish i was badass enough to have this tattoo and to have thought of it first!

- DIY Pumpkin Spice Lattes -

like any good american, i have fallen under that pressure of consumerism & enjoy ordering over priced lattes from starbucks from time to time. especially in the chilly fall/winter weather, ordering a pumpkin spice latte & a slice of pumpkin bread can make anyones day, mmmmmmm. but now i can bust out my little coffee maker & make my own!
btw, i am not a coffee drinker generally but i love these.

- via dustjacket attic -

i really just love the look of this photo, and the feeling it gives me. its so classic. i don't think i'll ever grow tired of over sized sunglasses & dark nail polish. this blog is filled with amazing photographs, it was largely the reason i have spent so much time on the computer tonight.

- via DMD Insight -

have you ever heard of the term "ikea hacked"? well neither did i until tonight! but since i saw this post on re-vamping a dresser purchased at ikea (oddly enough pete & i took a day trip there today, love that store), i've been inspired to do the same. then of course i had to look up "ikea hacked" and i found this delightful blog on doing just that! we are in despressed need of some quality storage, that looks nice, and is fairly inexpensive ( i'm so tired of looking at plastic bins). obviously, you can go purchase some unfinished wood furinture & do this same thing, but this post really got my wheels turning!

- No Bake Granola Balls -

pete & i love our chewy bars. most of our shopping adventures to the pathmark include the purchase of at least 2 boxes of chewy bars. but after seeing this post, i clearly need to start making my own. its super easy & so much healthier.

- Ikea Franklin Bar Stool -

lastly, this find comes from pete. why pete was browsing the beauty blogs this morning is beyond me, (hahahahaha) but he came across the perfect chair for my freelance makeup work! because of his find, we made a trip up to the ikea by us to check out the chair and if it would really work. its perfect & i'm excited to have a back pain free wedding.

it's amazing how far the internet has come. you have given me so much oh! lovely internet. thank you <3

--------------
Now Playing: Motion City Soundtrack - "Last Night"

birthdays & brownies

2009-09-23T21:18:00.004-04:00

first ...

Happy Birthday Pete!

this picture was taken when we first started dating, and we were camera whores. (thats what long distance does to you!) but we are still as goofy as ever!

so happy birthday to the one that loves me no matter what, accepts me just like i am, and never ceases to make me laugh! i love you, pete!

last night, pete & i went to go see face to face in nyc & without a doubt we had an amazing time. between singing along with the crowd, the lovely waitress at the all-night diner, & the great breeze through the city last night, we couldn't have planned it any better if we tried!

for his birthday i made some simply wonderful brownies (by recommendation of alvin) when i had attempted the black beans brownies (which turned out awful, probably more of my fault than the recipe's) pete begged me never to follow a brownie recipe ever again and just go with the box stuff. of course i didn't listen & wanted to prove him wrong! so i made this super simple, almost one bowl brownie recipe. the only thing i changed was the addition of white chocolate (his fave!)
i have redeemed myself & i am now allowed to try out more brownie recipes if i so choose! now go out and make some yummy brownies for your loved one's birthday, they'll appreciate it, promise!

lastly & again ...

Happy Birthday Pete! thank you for always being the one, xoxo

--------------
Now Playing: Northstar - "For Member Only" (live & acoustic)

"it's not so complicated"

2009-09-21T23:04:00.010-04:00

has it really been a month?! believe me, it's not for a lack of goings ons! it's just amazing how time has just zipped right on through to the end of september. where to begin?! ...

well, i finally did it. i convinced pete that i needed a blackberry. (like that, "i needed", b/c a new phone was not what i "needed" by any stretch, but hey, i'm only human) the truth is that his phone was on its last leg, and getting the blackberries for the both of us turned out to be a really good deal. (thank you ups!) i really love having it, and i am so happy that pete loves it too. i was alittle nervous that he wouldn't like it but he loves getting his sport updates, and playing texas holdem'. whew.

so pretty : )

since my last update we have been to texas and back again. it has been 2 years since i had been home, and man it was good to be back. everything has changed so much but at the same time it still felt just how i'd left it. we spent some quality time with old friends, and amazing family. we played alot of phase10, a little poker, and learned how to play mille bornes (grandma didn't like that game as much) i got to spend a good amount of time with my good friends tommy & crystal and their new little boy, zane. (baby fever!) we visited south oaks, got rained out at the ranger game, made some new friends at a charity cocktail party & baked! over all the trip was great, we didn't get much rest but it was a vacation well spent. here are some pictures in no particular order & i made them small so it doesn't blow up your internet connection. click to enlarge!

how sweet is he! he feel asleep on my chest & that alone made my heart melt.

he is a good baby, tommy & crystal lucked out. i hope pete & i are just as lucky!

tommy enjoying fatherhood. in the second picture zane looks like an old man or just like dr. dan (his grandfather)

the rain out ranger game, even though we didnt get to watch a game, we had a good time.

pete & my dad, and then pete & i at the ranger game.

grandma b & mama at the dallas world aquarium (which was awesome!) and then me & mama at the ranger game

some baked goods! easy cinnamon rolls & carrot cake. i also made homemade pancakes, & a lemon cake that didn't turn out so good. any baked good that calls for cake flour just never turns out well for me, so i'm over cake flour.

hampton & i in awe of the rear end of the mannequin at forever21.

i have some more pictures but i think i'll save those for a facebook album. i didn't take as many pictures as i would have liked but i say that everytime. i can't believe we have been home for a week now. sometimes going back to reality just plain stinks!

while we were in texas, pete & i celebrated our 2 year anniversary. 2 years, whoa! now i know that is no milestone but with the ups & downs we've had in those 2 years its nice to be here. even with the craziness we have gone through, i am so glad to be here with him. i don't think anyone else could ever handle either of us : ) love you, baybeh xoxo

hmm, i'm starting to lose focus on all the goings ons. but i think i nailed down the important things. i have some projects that i am working on, and also some great recipes to share! (of course once i attempt them) i'm loving the days as they get cooler & cooler. it's going to be a great end of the year. i can feel it!

tomorrow night pete & i are gonna go see face to face in the city. can't wait!
it was nice to update, we'll do this again soon!

--------------
Now Playing: Face To Face - "Sensible"

"cause even slurred words can contain some truth"

2009-08-26T00:16:00.004-04:00

august has been a month full of birthdays, so that means ALOT of baking has gone down in my kitchen!

at the beginning of the month i made vanilla cupcakes with chocolate ganache frosting. sadly, despite the wonderful yummy name, they turned out utterly horrible. i was very ashamed & baffled as to were i went wrong. not to toot my own horn but i can hold my own when it comes to baking, and read & follow a recipe quite well, but these just flat knocked me off my arse! (not in the good way!) i didn't even take pictures, thats how bad they were : (

so to redeem myself i made a simple vanilla yellow cake cupcake with super sweet buttercream frosting (i just followed the recipe on the domino powdered sugar box). my friend bentlee had requested these for his birthday, and they were a huge hit!

(sorry for the camera phone picture, i couldnt fine my digital, yet again!)

i even practiced some of my piping skills to give them that extra special touch. i was very pleased with these & they were delicious! rave reviews from my favorite test audience (my co-workers)

after that, mari requested some sort of banana cake for her birthday. to follow up my success the week before, i made banana nut cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. these turned out great! i was so pleased with myself & even alyne (friend/co-worker) told me "best cupcakes you have made to date!" the cake was super moist, sweet but not overly sweet, and had a great melt in your mouth texture. the only thing i changed in the recipe was i added a cup and half of chopped walnuts, turned out wonderful! in the past i struggle with making cream cheese frosting, & pete would beg me to just buy the canned stuff. my previous attempts always seemed to turn out translucent & a sticky oozy mess. but i was not going to be defeated by a canned oil filled icing, i couldnt be! after searching numerous sites, i think i found the perfect recipe, it was like a dream. fluffy, sweet, & tangy. pure perfection!

the mess that doubling a recipe can cause. the batter got so big i had to spit it in half just so it wouldnt over load my bowl & hand mixer.

various toppings, sprinkles, coconut, & walnuts.

my favorite cupcake pan is the texas sized one. (i love it partly because its "texas" size :) )

next week for marixa's birthday i'm going to make chocolate cupcakes with three different frostings. & practice piping some more (chocolate buttercream, mint buttercream, & peanut butter)

so get to baking people!

** less than two weeks until i'm in texas!

--------------
Now Playing: Death Cab for Cutie - "Talking Like Turnstiles"

if you would have asked me 5 years ago ...

2009-08-18T00:01:00.006-04:00

... i would have thought i would either have a kid, or at least be pregnant at this point in my life. now that thought scares me! my how things have changed!

tonight while going through my daily blog roll, i was hit with an overwhelming sense of sadness. this might be hard to explain but bare with me ...

one of my best friends, crystal, is pregnant and embarking on this crazy, wonderful, & amazing journey of parenthood with her wonderful hubby, tommy. it's hard to believe sometimes that we are old enough to be married, paying rent, and working real jobs, let alone be thinking about having children!

so cute & preggers!

pete & i are very clear on the fact that niether of us are ready to have children just yet. there are a bunch of reason why we feel this way, but if it were to happen tomorrow, we would be excited none the less. but for now we're content on being just pete & bekah. although i'm happy with our current situation, i can't lie & say i don't have a touch of baby fever. i get excited when i imagine what he or she would look like, what names we would choose, and what type of parents would we be. seeing alot of my friends having babies on facebook & seeing so many babies & pregnant ladies at work, i can't help but wonder.

one of the best bridesmaids ever!

now with that being said, after reading crystal's blog entry tonight i was overcome by sadness. i wish i was in texas experiencing all of this with her & tommy. i was so excited (&honored) when she called and told me she was pregnant & then again when they found out they were having a boy. i've followed her blog & facebook filled with photos, and the descriptions my mom would give me when she saw her at church. i can't tell you how happy i am for her (&toms). i just wish i was there! i wish i could have been at her baby shower, helped with baby zane's room, and see her growing belly. i know it sounds crazy to say i'm sad, but i can't seem to think of another adjective to describe how i feel right now. i'm sad for myself that i'm missing out on these amazing life changing things in her life, because her & i have experienced many life changing experiences together. (it happens when you've been friends since 5th grade!)

i think this is when we were in 8th grade, south oaks fall festival

luckily, her due date is september 10th & i will be in texas! i'm so hoping that zane will come before or while i'm in town so i can meet him. (haha because its all about me, kidding!)

i can't remember where this was taken, but i'm pretty sure we were either junior or seniors in high school

it's funny how different our lives are & how different they are from what we talked about & imagined they would be like. there is a huge part of me that wishes that pete & i lived in texas. that i was surrounded by my friends & family, and not relying on facebook for daily updates. but of course, i'm not so sure i would change how everything has played out either. its kinda funny, i'm reaching that age of where enough time has passed to see what is & what could have been.

even though i am sad for myself in this moment, i couldn't be anymore excited & ready to see her in september. so get ready crystal! ( & zane!) love you xoxo

--------------
Now Playing: Cobra Starship - "Pete Wentz is the Reason We're Famous"

bella vs. sookie

2009-08-12T21:56:00.007-04:00

ok, ok, ok. so maybe i'm alittle behind on the whole twilight gig & alittle ashamed that i've jumped on the hype bandwagon, but i can't help it, i love it! i've finally finished the whole series, and while i was slightly disappointed with "Breaking Dawn", overall i really enjoyed the books. they were super easy reads & kept me entertained, to where i would spent 5 straight hours reading at a time. (maybe i'm just easily entertained!)

i'm excited for the release of "New Moon" in november & "Eclipse" in june 2010. liquesa and i have already set up a date for us to go see it! (we've been twilight buddies at work) but if you haven't read them & you enjoy a good love story, along with some good mystery you should check them out. i know some of you out there are closet fans! it's alright, let it be know! : )

between reading the twilight series, i picked up on the "Sookie Stackhouse Series". if you haven't heard about it, i'm sure you've heard of the hbo show, "True Blood" (which is soooo good! anna paquin is great!) the show is based off the 8 novels & both are extremely entertaining! a group of us at work are obsessed with the show & talk about it all time.

i've read some talk that stephanie meyers (author of twilight) ripped off charlaine harris (author of the sookie stackhouse books). while there are quite alot of similarities between the books, overall the stories are very different & both enjoyable for different reasons.

this little vampire kick i've been on has been a fun mindless getaway for me (mostly on my lunch breaks at work) & i'm excited to finish the rest of the sookie books eventually.

so, get to reading people! & watch true blood, you won't be disappointed! (unless you're my mom, she wouldn't like it to much! haha)

BTW i'm not quite sure if i will be dvr-ing the new cw show "The Vampire Diaries". but i can't say that i am not slightly intrigued. of course its got pretty much the same plot as twilight & true blood, alittle mix of both it seems. so who knows, we'll see! fringe & heroes comes back in september, now that is worth watching!

--------------
Now Playing: "How Long Is To Long" - The Get Up Kids

"baby, what do you know?!"

2009-08-03T21:55:00.004-04:00

pete & i were in desperate need to go grocery shopping after weeks of eating out (& junk at that!) we finally made it to the pathmark.
as you can see we were down to the bare minimum! (i had just put the chicken & eggs in when i deciced to take the picture) kinda sad if you ask me, especially for someone that loves to cook!
then after a fun filled hour at the store we had a plentiful fridge. we made a pack that for the rest of the week we would only eat what we bought today & what we would make. after spending a silly amount of money on eating out in july, our wallets need this much needed break. (not to mention our bodies!) so tonight we hopped right to it & made "grilled chicken ranch pitas" yum! pete is really good at coming up with quick an easy meals & together pitas we made. it was alot of fun to share our tiny little kitchen and enjoy our well executed meal.

(sorry for the camera phone picture, i couldn't find my digital at the moment)

Here is the run down of the "recipe"

Grilled Chicken Ranch Pitas
2 chicken breast, grilled & cut into strips
1 cup of chopped lettuce
half of a small onion, finely chopped
half of a cucumber, chopped
1/2 cup of grape tomatoes, quatered
1/2 cup of shredded mozzarella cheese (or any shredded cheese you like)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper (we like our food peppery)
2 tablespoons of lite ranch dressing
2 warmed pitas, spilt in half

Combine all ingredients in a bowl, mix well. Fill pitas & enjoy!

the nice thing about this meal is that its super easy, filling, & not all that bad for you! pitas are also a great meal starter, pete & i kept coming up with ideas of what to fill the rest of our pitas with. hope y'all enjoy it just as much as we did!

--------------
Now Playing: Voxtrot - "Berlin, without return" ( i am currently obsessed with this song, its been on loop all day, <3)

happy birthday mama!

2009-07-31T23:42:00.005-04:00

before july is over & august begins (can it really already be august?!) i need to say ...

happy birthday mama!

i feel so blessed to have such a wonderful mom. even though we don't always see eye to eye or at times think we are crazy, she is the best mother i could have ever asked for. my mom is the quite & reserved type, and of course i am not, i'm more the loud & eccentric type. (but most of y'all knew that) she is an amazing listener & always surprises me with her never ending wisdom. me & her have been through alot together, and as i get older our bond grows stronger. (despite the distance) it was so wonderful to spend time with her while they were up this month & i can't wait to see her in september! one month away!

don't be fooled, she might be reserved, but probably way more goofier than me. it had to come from some where!

love you, xoxo

Bon Appetit!

2009-07-29T22:28:00.005-04:00

last night at work, while waiting for 6:30 to come along so i could head home. my friend (and manager), juanita asked if i wanted to go see a free preview of the new movie Julie & Julia. hell yeah! i wanted to see that movie when it came out & to see it for free was even better. if you don't know anything about it, it's based on the 2 true stories of Julia Childs & Julie Powell. of course you know, Julia Childs is a famous cook/tv personality & Julie Powell is a food blogger that decided to make every single recipe in Julia's cookbook for a year. it was super cute & had some good laughs. both Meryl Streep & Amy Adams were absolutely delightful in the movie. so i encourage all of y'all to go see it when it comes out. i'm sure all my blogger friends will enjoy it that much more!

now i must look up flight info like i promised my sister in law i would do. going home to texas in september! i can't wait! :)

--------------
Now Playing: Tegan & Sara - "Nineteen"

2009-07-27T22:22:00.004-04:00

i think this is really cool. the white house has a flickr photostream. some of the pictures are really awesome, & it's kinda neat to follow the goings on's in the white house. a while back, pete & i watched this nbc special about a day in the life of the white house. it was really interesting to watch & in a strange way you felt like you were apart of the craziness! hope you enjoy this as much as i do!

---------------
Now Playing: Northstar - "Two Zero Two"

birthdays & rain

2009-07-26T22:43:00.005-04:00

it's raining. i love the smell of the rain. there was even some lighting thrown in there & for a moment it felt like home. the other night bentlee & i were closing & we decided to go to chili's for some margarita's after work. it was that muggy but cool breeze you get right before a summer storm, the sky flickered with lighting, and the smell is just so soothing. i said to bentlee, it feels like the south & he understood exactly what i meant. he responded with "i loved sitting outside and watching the storm pass through" & it is so true. i use to sit outside in the garage with my dad, watching the lighting & reaching my hand out to feel the rain. the connection of "the south" me & bentlee have is a great comfort for me. its like being in this north east bubble with an alli, he is wonderful!

today is my brother, kelly's birthday! i always make a joke between my brothers of who is my favorite. but the best part of it all is that i will always be their favorite sister, thats the thing about being the only one! of course i don't have a favorite, but the best thing about growing up, and being a "grown up" is that my relationship between my brothers & i has turned into so much more than i could have ever imagine. i still suffer from little sister syndrome from time to time, but i feel so blessed to have them as my brothers. kelly & i never really grew up together, and we often go way to long from seeing & speaking to each other. even still, we have always had a closeness & a sense of respect for one another.

Happy Birthday Kelly! xoxo

july is a busy months for me & birthdays. this past friday was our nephew aidan's birthday. i can't believe he is actually one! its hard to believe that it has been a whole year.
for the party i made a cupcake stand with some red velvet cupcakes. i've been working on my piping and i was quite proud of how this turned out.

Happy First Birthday Aidan! xoxo

he is so cute! pete & i got to have some fun with aidan before the party started. he's alittle shy & since we don't get to see him as often as i like, i was excited that he was coming to us & playing more. it's so hard to believe he is one! its amazing how time flies and how much he has grown.

at the end of the week is my mama's birthday & then its august! like whoa!

--------------
Now Playing: Face to Face - "Complicated"

ben ben ben

2009-07-24T01:21:00.004-04:00

i always seem to start my post off this way, so why stray from the norm?! i should really be in bed right now. i'm not exhausted but i will surely be in the morning! but after seeing pete off to work, & enjoying a slice of red velvet cake (ok, it wasn't a slice, it was a cupcake) i started to listen to this one song over & over again.
music is a GIGANTIC part of my life. most people come home & turn on the tv, i come home & turn off the tv to put some tunes on. & when i am in love with a particular song at the moment i will play it over & over again. (poor pete haha) i wish i had a better way to share these songs with you, but i don't trust those music player things i found & youtube seems to work just fine. your browser is probably hating me, but i hope you take the time to listen to one or maybe even two of the songs i'm digging at the moment.

tonight, this is the song i have on loop. no words, just a beautiful piano. wish i could play!

lately, i've been on a ben kick, listening to all different artist but they all share the common name of ben. i've told pete before that i wanted to name our son (if we were to have one) ben because all of the musically talented bens out there but apparently his cousin has a son named ben & that would be strange (or so i was told). i personally don't really care because i've never met his cousin, but maybe he'll change his mind when the time comes :) anyways, on to the ben's ...

ben gibbard is the lead singer for death cab for cutie. now i realize that it's the whole band that makes the song, but i'm more than pretty sure he writes most of their stuff & he's also been the master mind behind numerous other project.

ben lee! how can you not love this aussie who sings with his accent. & his songs are catchy & feel good sing-a-longs.

this is ben lee doing a cover of a song about himself. the original song writer is chris rowe from the ataris, is not ben lee's biggest fan. you have to love how he doesn't take himself so seriously & just enjoys what he does.

& lastly, ben folds. this song was the song that pete & i had our first danced to at our wedding. it's a simple love song that for me really translate how i feel about pete & vice versa. again, gotta love the piano. (after our ceremony we walked back down the aisle to "love me like the world is ending" by ben lee, we love our bens!)

i know this might be alot to take in, but i hope you all enjoy these songs as much as i do. maybe even find a new favorite!

ok, now i'm tired. goodnight world!

homesick texan

2009-07-21T22:29:00.006-04:00

remember a while ago i said i would make a new recipe each week?! well even though i haven't blogged alot about it since, i have kept to my promise. i couldn't decide which recipe to share first so i just randomly picked this one ...

few weeks ago was my friend sean's birthday & he said i could test a new recipe so i tested the texas sheet cake. oddly enough being from texas i've never heard of this recipe until my dear friend jen crane told me all about it. i found a recipe off of one of my favorite cooking blogs & deciced this would be good for my baker friend.

the finished yum cake!
& as you can tell it was a huge hit at work.
marixa couldn't get enough of it! unfortunately i didnt get a chance to get a picture with the birthday boy. but i guarantee that he loved it just as much!
(i love the pink lipstick that is sitting next to the cake in this photo, its so mac)

-- Texas Sheet Cake --
the lady that writes the blog is so clever in how she describes this cake & i agree with her 100%

so thanks to jen crane for sharing the wonder that is texas sheet cake & i will be helping your mom make these for your wedding in greece! & happy birthday to my sweet sweet friend sean!

--------------
Now Playing: Ben Lee - What's So Bad (About Feeling Good)?

five good things

2009-07-17T01:50:00.005-04:00

its late & i really should be in bed. but i just had to share this. its a small printable booklet of 5 good things that you write down every day of the week. what a great idea! after a day of craziness at work, cars catching fire at the grocery store(true story!), & an intense (but wonderful) phone date with my anam cara (a.k.a hampton) i found this and i feel its something i need to do more often, to sit down each day and think about the good things. so often we forget what those things are & dwell on the crap ( i'm a big time dweller!) but tonight i won't, and hopefully less often in the future. soooo check it out! its free!

-- Whisker Graphics - 5 Good Things Booklet --

--------------
Now Playing: The Get Up Kids - Long Goodnight

for the lack of a better post

2009-07-11T00:45:00.006-04:00

i was getting good there for awhile, posting often & what not but since then life has caught up with me & left my little ol' blog behind. but i have good reason to be gone! here are some snap shots of the past two weeks. (i love my camera phone, btw)

jen crane in town! it was so wonderful to see her & i hope she had just as much fun as i did!
whats a holiday without alittle baking from bekah, red, white, & blue pound cake with lemon glaze. (thank you for your help jen!)
after jen crane's departure :( along came bob & margaret! it was so much fun seeing my parents. can't wait to see them again in september!
a delayed 4th of july outting at my brother chris's house. my nephews, damien & keegan enjoying some sparkler time. i must say these kids could be the coolest that we've have met & hung out with to date.
i can't believe i did it, but i got bob & margaret to the city! we went to see the titanic exhibit in the city & even my dad wanted to go! i was shocked but so happy that they both decided to come. the exhibit was pretty amazing, alittle sad at times, but overall great.
lastly, update in the city with sean. on our lunch break we ran into the cupcake moblie! this is why i love new york. what a great idea! alittle pricey, but the fun of ordering cupcakes off a truck out ruled anything else.

so, not for nothing, good times have been had. 09' is proving to be a great summer!

--------------
Now Playing: The Gossip - Heavy Cross

"it's not an option baybeh, i'm not letting go"

2009-06-25T22:57:00.008-04:00

the other night i went out and purchased a bundt pan to make the monkey bread & tonight i think i found the best bundt pan recipe. with the combination for peanut butter & chocolate, how could you disagree?! the thought to cancel my gym membership crossed my mind because really?! i just gained 10 pounds looking at this delicious photo.

-- Peanut Butter Pound Cake w/Chocolate Glaze --

i don't know about you, but i'm always purchasing vanilla for all my baked goodies & good vanilla is expensive! but in just two months i'm gonna have my very own vanilla! this is a very simple recipe for homemade vanilla & i can't believe i didn't know about this sooner. this will be my project for sunday.

-- Homemade Vanilla Extract --

right before pete left for work i told him i found the perfect peanut butter & chocolate cake recipe for him, and he took a good look at the picture above & said,

Pete - "it looks amazing, can't wait to try it! but weren't you trying to make more healthy things?!"
Me - "it is healthy because i'll be making it!"
Pete - "AH! so being homemade makes it healthy, gotcha"

hahaha, i love how he plays into my craziness xoxo

--------------

of course i couldn't end this blog without saying, R.I.P. Michael Jackson. i always felt he led such a sad & tragic life, much like elvis or marylin monroe. and i'll never forget watching thriller for the first time! no matter what your opinion is about him, you can't take away the simple fact that he was crazy talented & an icon for our time. so, R.I.P. Michael Jackson.

--------------
Now Playing: This Providence - Squeaking Wheels & White Lights

"it was so easy & words so sweet"

2009-06-23T22:12:00.006-04:00

today i had a meeting at butt thirty for work & it turned into a delightful, rain free day! the meeting was good & it was nice to see everyone after my vacation. (especially quesa b/c she was gone on vacation the week before & its been a whole 2 weeks since we've seen each other! we're ok now :) ) i baked some monkey bread for the meeting & sported my championship penguins shirt that i got in pittsburgh. the monkey bread was delicious, super easy to make, very virsitile and i can't wait till our nephew aidan gets older so i make this with him. (& of course with our own children, eventually)

-- Monkey Bread Recipe --

*the recipe says to bake it for 30-35 mins, i think 40-45 is better, at least for my oven

after the meeting a few of us hit up a great thrift store in paterson & i snagged some great frames for the picture wall my dad & i are going to start. i'm excited because i was alittle overwhelmed at the prices of frames but i got some wonderful frames to start with. now i just need to finish printing the photos i want to showcase. ( the to do list is never ending! )

all these great frames for less than $20 bucks! i can't wait to hit up some more shops & cover my wall.

even with this face, mari could be one of the most beautiful people i know, inside & out. i love how she just wants to have fun & enjoy the day!

best sunglasses ever!

"penguins over dinner" -mari

so with my vacation almost at an end, i'm sad to report that i didn't get done nearly the amount of things i wanted to but "tomorrow is another day" (thanks mxpx). though i would not say this vacation was unsuccessful, because i did do ...

1. road trip to pittsburgh! yay pens!
2. played bingo with grandma b
3. went strawberry picking (blog coming soon, with recipes!)
4. made dinner & dessert almost every night
5. spent some time in the sun at the jersey shore with good company (it's not an east coast thing, its just what they call it, haha)
6. did the makeup for my friend's daughter's wedding (fun times!)
7. watched angels & demons
8. took several walks with my wonderful hubby
9. spent some quality time with the in-laws & aidan!
10. went to the city to see h2O with the jeff turner network
11. cleaned out the bedroom closet, one down, two to go! ( i now sleep better at night)
12. cleaned out the cars
13. donated bag of stuff to the goodwill
14. fell in love with the new regina specktor album

so with that little list i think its safe to say i had a very nice, produtive vacation & i can't complain. next up, a few days off while the folks are in town! can.not.wait.!

--------------
Now Playing: Regina Specktor - Eet

Happy Father's Day!

2009-06-21T10:23:00.009-04:00

Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there!

today we are gonna hangout with the fam, have some burgers (rain or shine!) & enjoy baby aidan for a while. tonight pete & i are going to the city to see H2O with a few friends. it may or may not be at the new knitting factory but none the less it will be a good time. hardxcore show with turner, never a bad time!

i've made a promise to myself that i will take TONS of pictures while my folks are in town. i can not wait to see them and spend some quality time with them! but for now older picture will have to do.

i can't tell you how much my dad means to me. (i'm getting teary eye-ed jus thinking about it) he is always been there for me & always loves & supports me in whatever i may do. he is smart, gracious, funny, thoughtful, and always keeps me thinking! i love being around him & just enjoying his company. (even if he hogs the remote!) he never lets me drag on about the silly things in life (b/c i tend draaaagggg on) & he always has a listening ear with some helpful advice to follow. (sometimes unsolicited but its always what i need to hear) my folks are driving up in july for a week and i'm so excited i could burst! but i will hold back for now & share some pictures,

the pops & i

grandpa bob @ his best!

we rarely kiss on the cheek, but always head bunt

happy bob
my brother kelly with our beautiful niece, mary margaret. he is a wonderful daddy & she is a very lucky little girl.

pete's brother, dietz & our cutie pie nephew aidan. dietz is such an amazing dad & aidan is lucky to have him as a daddy as well!

happy father's day to all the great dads out there (& all the dad's to be!)
EDIT! i didn't mean to leave out pete & his pops, i just didn't have a picture of the two of them together, strangely. but i made good work on father's day and snapped one of them together.

like father like son, these two could be the chillest people i know. i sure did luck out with a great father in-law, and he isn't to shabby as a pops too!

--------------
Now Playing: Regina Specktor - Samson

Let's Go Pens!

2009-06-17T00:08:00.002-04:00

hockey was never a sport i knew much about, because lets face it i'm from texas & even though we have the dallas stars, it was never a sport that was watched or talked about while growing up. but soon after pete & i started dating that changed completely. he is a HUGE hockey buff. can name pretty much any player and pronounce the crazy russian names as if it was his second language. he loves the sport and i can't help but be drawn into the excitement he has for it and cheer on his favorite team & players. so you can imagine how crazy our little apartment was when the pittsburgh penguins ( pete's favorite time & of course now mine) won the stanley cup! i think i might have been even more excited then he was, because i was jumping around & screaming like the crazy woman that i am! on sunday, us & a few friends drove out to pittsburgh for the parade on monday, probably one of the best days/trip to date!
some pictures from our adventure -- go here if you want to see them all

the massive crowd! grandma b later told me that there were 375,000 ppl there

pete, the hardXcore penguin fan!

marc-andre fluery & sidney crosby with the stanley cup!
the whole crew from jersey!

it was such a good trip & i'm so glad that we decided to go. i couldn't have asked for a better time with better people!

i haven't forgotten my promise to make one new recipe a week. last week i posted about the black bottom cupcakes, and boy were they yummy! mmmmmm! i could have made these all day every day. i think this could be my favorite chocolate cake batter, it was so light, fluffy, & delicious. ( i consumed a mad amount of raw egg when i made these )
they were a big hit at work, and the aroma was just amazing. this week i'll be making more things because i am on vacation. i'm looking forward to making some of these recipes i have on file. this morning i made a quick yogurt parfait. i am the queen of asking pete to go pick us up a bagel or something, but this morning i was good and made good work of my strawberries, and left over yogurt.
it was just as tasty as it looks, just less blurry :)

well our trip to pittsburgh was a great start to my va-cay, and here is to getting some good cooking done as well! (maybe even clean out our closets *crosses fingers*) oh! & strawberry picking, june isn't over yet!

--------------
Now Playing: The Get Up Kids - Campfire Kansas

your love has come to late

2009-06-10T22:23:00.007-04:00

sometimes, i just feel really pathetic. sigh.

moving on to awesomeness ...
well this isn't so awesome, but i finally made the "amazing black bean brownies", but unfortunately they we not so "amazing". i can't help but feel that maybe i messed something up & i really don't want to admit to that. the recipe calls for coffee grounds and surprisingly that is all i can taste, and it doesn't taste good. i may have to give it another go, but pete begged me to just make regular brownies from a box! haha at least he is honest. luckily, i will surely redeem myself with these tasty cupcakes,

- Black Bottom Cupcakes w/Goat Cheese -

i'll be making them for my managers birthday, but i'm gonna go for cream cheese instead of the goat cheese, for alittle more cheesecake likeness. yum!

i always struggle with my "to do's" ( for the most part, i think we all do) & i came across these lovely chalkboards,

- MaryKateMcDevitt Etsy Shop -

i've debated on purchasing this but i might just have to steal the idea and make my own. sometimes i under estimate my crafting ability (laziness is such a curse!) & i think this will be a fun project to work on.

next week i have vacation & i'm looking forward to getting some necessary & fun things done. but at the top of the list is going strawberry picking and then making some great things from pickings.

--------------

this pretty much sums me up at the moment.
( found here )

--------------
Now Playing: Patrick Wolf - Bluebells

live to eat or eat to live

2009-06-03T21:56:00.006-04:00

i know that i keep saying i am blog obsessed but its true! (just ask pete, he'd tell ya) but the more i keep reading the more and more i find all these other amazing blogs. i've never utilized my bookmarks so much in my life until now. i blame hampton, she introduced me to DesignCrush, and it all went down hill from there.

the thing i take away from these jewels on the internet is the inspiration to make my "real" life more thoughtful and fun! after getting married and starting our home, i have taken to my kitchen like a fish to water. i never minded cooking but now that i have my own kitchen, something just clicked and i love it! (aside from doing dishes) unfortunately, i don't cook/bake as much as i would like and i really think that stems from a lack of inspiration. now, through my obsessive blog hunting i have found some amazing recipes that i want to try out. my goal is to try one new recipe a week. no matter what it is i want to try something new. i feel this goal is do-able and a great way to be productive & creative. (maybe even alittle more healthier)

i found this printable calendar for the month of june & i'm going to mark all the recipes that i want to try each week, just to keep track! (download & print it for free here)

here are some of the recipes that i added to my list ...

Egg Salad Sandwich + Coconut Macaroon Pancakes

Amazing Black Bean Brownies + Baked Doughnuts

Baby Bran Muffins + Five Minute Tomato Sauce

of course i'm more drawn to the sweets/baking recipes but i have a few savory ones i'm excited to try. all these recipes were found at 101 Cookbooks. she has an abundance of recipes & i love how she writes so clever.

i think the first one i'm going to try is the black bean brownies, they look so moist & fudgy! i also can't wait to try them out on my co-workers! my brother in law will probably love them as well, he has a thing for black beans. i'll let you know how it all turns out!

now the q key works

2009-06-01T23:38:00.006-04:00

can it really be june?!?! every time i would write the date on a return at work i would say to myself "is it really may something" and now its june! way to fly by 2009!

i didn't plan on posting anything because i thought i was tired, BUT i have stumbled upon some amazing finds that i just had to share ...

1st

as soon as i saw this i told pete i needed it. he of course didn't see the purpose, but thought it was cute because it said do work (something we say all the time "D.W. - Do Work") its from the etsy shoppe twoguitars ... but don't even think about buying it before me, after this post, it's mine! haha he also has some other really beautiful prints, so i'm sure you'll be able to find something you love just as much. i can't wait to write all my to-do list in it.

2nd

i have been debating on getting a iphone for quite a while now but since i have verizon & really i think ultimately i would get more use outta a blackberry (i might just get both, i wish), this app could be another check mark on the reasons to get an iphone. its an app from sherwin-williams, you can upload an image, find a paint color you want, and the coordinating colors. how fun! the rumor is that they will realize a new iphone this summer so i'm going to hold out. but i wish verizon didn't pass on the iphone, life would be so much simpliar right now, at least when i need to pick out paint colors.

& 3rd

the best thing about june, is that it's strawberry season! there is a local farm by dietz's house (the bro-in-law) that lets you go out into the fields and pick your own strawberries. when i first moved to jersey, dietz had just got some & i think i ate every single one (haha great first impression bek) but they were so juicy, fresh, and delicious. ever since then i have wanted to go strawberry picking in june but some how over the past 4 years june comes & goes, & i'm strawberry-less. not this year! i will make it out there this month, even if i go on my own!

time to wash the face, brush the teeth, and hit the hay! gonna wake up early, call hampton & do work!

"turn it up, i never wanna go home"

2009-05-27T22:32:00.005-04:00

doesn't this picture just make you wanna take a road trip to the nearest ocean?! i've seen this on a few blogs that i follow, & the more i see it the more i love it! photographer -- Anna Wolf.
i'm hoping this summer that pete & i will take more trips to the jersey shore. it sounds kinda strange, but being that i'm not from jersey, the shore is always exciting for me!

how stinkin' cool are these litter boxes from ModKat! they're alittle pricey but i might just have to splurge on the kids. our apartment isn't to small but small enough to not have enough room for everything and i think one these colorful little boxes would be perfect for our cats. it will saves some space & make the litter box area alittle more appealing.

one of my goals for my week of vacation in june is to start hanging some of our frames & pictures. i order 2 great frames off etsy and i'm excited to get them up! we've lived in this apartment for 2 years and barely have any thing on the wall (we thought we wouldn't be here this long, ha! working on year #3) if i don't do anything else, let me get this done!

off to switch places with the petey pie & get some sleep. today was good.!

happy birthday grandma b!

2009-05-22T21:07:00.005-04:00

i know i tweeted a few hours ago that i secretly love the summer, but right now i'm not loving it so much. its hot! & i realize that i have a lower tolerance to the heat than most but the way people are about the cold, i'm about the heat. another part of the problem is that some how new jersey missed the boat on central air & having the little window units just sucks up alot more energy & makes the electric bill redunkulious so, we keep it to the bedroom. (because who can really sleep when they're hot & sweaty?!?! & not in the good way! ewww!) as of right now im a tad uncomfortable in this heat, which will only get worse & i'm ready for the fall again ... moving on!

today is grandma b's birthday! 84 & kickin' it! this morning i brought over some flowers & lemon poppy seed muffins (my favorite, mmm) & enjoyed some quality time with her. she really is so much fun for me. i love listening to her stories, and could let her talk all day. she isn't one of those grandma's that just go on & on, she is interesting, maybe alittle repetitive, but always fun! i feel so blessed to have her in my life and have this chance to really get to know her. i didn't really grow up around any of my grandparents, & never really understood the bond that so many people talked about. now i get it, now i have a bond like that & i couldn't be happier!

why my head looks so gigantic, i dont know

always so classy. how i wish i lived in these times!

i saw this the other day & i MUST own one!

it's the piece to my cupcake saturdays that i'm missing. it holds 36 cupcakes, which is more than enough for everyone at work & so much easier than carrying all the tin trays in! everyone has been dying for me to make the margarita cupcakes again but i haven't been in the mood lately. (partly because i dont want to eat them, its starting to show :( ) maybe next weekend if pete lets me order this!

must go cool off!

happy birthday daddy!

2009-05-16T23:31:00.004-04:00

i'm almost outta time, but i wanted to post a uick blog for my dad's birthday. the sad thing about this blog, is that while searching for a picture, i realized i don't have any recent picture of him and that is something i will have to remedy when he is up here in july. but for now, wedding pictures will have to do.
so happy birthday to the most amazing father anyone could ask for! i love you.!
my dad & i have always had this thing where we bump heads instead of a kiss on the cheek. it started when i was a little girl & he tried to teach me how to give eskimo kisses, but instead i just banged my head against his, haha, but over time i've become alittle more gentle about it, & i love that we have this special little thing that lets each other know that we love each other.

i do believe that my very first memory as a kid is of him. standing in the doorway with a box of pizza & a long white jacket on (very 80's). i remember thinking that my mom invited the pizza man in, fun! i wish i could photograph the image in my head when i think of that moment. i'm so glad my mom invited the pizza man in that day, because i couldn't imagine my life without him.

happy birthday daddy!

........

lastly, before i go to bed & because i must get to bed soon! tomorrow i'm doing the AIDS Walk in NYC. most of my crew from work will be there & i'm excited to spend the day with them (rain or shine!) and support a good cause. mac is a huge supporter in helping men, women, and children living with or effected by aids, and i love that i work for a company that is really decated to bettering the lives of people. wish us luck tomorrow, and pray the rain will subside for a while!

-- AIDS Walk NYC --

-- MAC Viva Glam, MAC AIDS Fund --

trash the rental

2009-05-15T10:23:00.006-04:00

one day, in my town home ( i would much rather prefer a town home to a house ) i will have a room with a wall like this, filled with books, pictures, & chachkas. where & when ever that may be ...

i dont really like to complain about my job because i really love/enjoy it & i feel lucky to have it. but sometimes i lack the energy or the creativity to look amazing or to "work it out" as bentlee would say. so today i will opt for the classic red lip, it always perks me up & with the littlest of effort i will work it out!

pete took these, fritz wasnt really feeling it :)

i just want back in your head

2009-05-11T23:12:00.008-04:00

first off, i love my new blog header. i borrowed the picture from foodbeam & the lyric is from the bishop allen song "queen of the rummage sale" ... i think the line is very hopeful & if we just take everything day by day, or stitch by stitch, that it will all work out in the end.

i've become obsessed with reading through all theses delightful blogs that i stubble upon, and it has inspired me to blog more often & share with you (even if its like 3 people that read this) the things i find that make me smile.
since getting married and figuring out how we like to function, i have fallen in love with our tiny kitchen & with cooking & baking. mostly baking because i have a sweet tooth that could rival anyone! i really enjoy making cupcakes for any occasion, & have sorta set myself up at work as the betty crocker of the team. tonight i found this amazing website, i think they really made it for me -- Bake It Pretty --

i showed pete some of these pictures & he had the greatest response, "those are the things you bake them in and then throw away, right?!" haha i could help but laugh because he didn't get it, but as long as he loves to eat my cupcakes, i dont care. i do know that my fellow baker, sean, at work is going to love these!

they also had this cupcake icing kit, & i really wanna try it and see if i can't get better at my presentation. i love the homemade look of just spreading the icing on with a knife, but how great do these cupcakes look! i can already tell that i am going to love the tip with the blue icing.

also, i've been collecting different things over the past couple of months for my friends that are having babies (or have had recently) & i think i found the perfect gift tags! i wish i saw this website 2 years ago when i was buying wedding invitations ( i hated mine!). they have such pretty and elegant prints. i'm excited to wrap up my gifts with these tags -- Linda & Harriett --

i wish i could get married all over again, just so i can have these invitations. (& this time i wouldn't put peter frederick, haha)

it's going to be one of those nights where i stay up all night just futzing around the apartment. hope the downstairs neighbors don't mind ...

happy mama's day

2009-05-10T23:13:00.002-04:00

happy mama's day to all the lovely mom's in my life!
& to all the mama's to be, happy mama's day to you as well

random things to share

2009-05-08T23:13:00.005-04:00

isn't this picture sexy?!

it's the balloons that do it for me!

i do believe this is truth.!

i want this nail polish but $22 bucks?! come on now!

i'm creating a wish list. i plan on purchasing one thing a week. (really, maybe one every two weeks) BUT! i need to get my baby/birthday peoples stuff done first though.

words to live by ...

2009-05-06T22:33:00.004-04:00

i wish i could get a copy of this or maybe i'll just have to recreate it. i want to make 2 & frame them, one for work and one for home.

"we'll work harder, harder, harder, hard times!"

2009-05-04T23:40:00.003-04:00

i neeeeeed this shirt

-- smash --

my right ear is starting to bother me & its been popping alot. i'm alittle nervous i might have an ear infection from swimming :( my ears have always been sensitive to things like this & they've never really drained properly. guess i need to get some ear plugs, or tubes put in! haha

& lastly i'm obsessed with this song, he is so super talented it's really rather ridiculous. maybe in my next life i'll be blessed with musical talent ...

it's after noon some where!

2009-05-03T09:36:00.007-04:00

is it to early to be thinking about a drink?! it isn't even noon yet! but with cinco de mayo right around the corner and the constant inspiration from hampton, has made me excited to plan alittle get together. the most important part, beeritas & of course dessert, margarita cake (or cupcakes because thats how i roll). i haven't put together the rest of the menu just yet but i'm thinking of some sort of lime chicken & fiesta veggies?! i'll have to get pete to make his macaroni salad. i'm excited to test run some of these recipes today for alittle phase 10 with grandma b.

-- BeerRitas --

-- Margarita Cake --

i bit the bullet and joined la fitness, and i'm happy that i did. when i got into the pool on friday i didn't feel overwhelmed but energized to continue on. so now i'm off to get my swim on!

kate is great!

2009-04-30T23:21:00.002-04:00

it's amazing how tape has got me all excited! but i found "happy tape" japanese masking tape that comes in different colors and styles. i think they will work great for making a couple of the photo albums that i have in mind. it's going to be so hard to choose what to get!

kate finally had her baby boy, Lex! i'm so excited for her & i can just tell she is so happy. i can't wait until we go to australia to visit her & the fam. what a great shot,

finally, i decided to join the gym that i have been swimming at for the past week or so. im alittle nervous that i'll waste it, but i'm promising myself to make it at least 3 days a week & i think that is do-able and fair. i feel so much better when i do it, & i'm making the conscience effort to get a move on!

ps. oh! new iphone, when will you be here? i can't wait to switch!

never fades! fades away!

2009-04-27T07:59:00.002-04:00

i kept my promise to myself this weekend and make good work of my polaroid camera. it was alot of fun for everyone, there is something sweet & simple about a polaroid, that you just lose with a digital.

i'm extremely fortunate to have a retail job & to always have sunday off, but sometimes the options of having saturdays off would be nice too. (it's never enough!) because you miss out on these great moments,

i really wish i had the motivation to go swimming this morning. its a struggle at times to get there but once i do, i feel so much better and accomplished. i'm just not sure i want to join, i'm afraid that i won't keep my commitment & there is really no funds we can spare. ugh! these lazy bones!

"yeah, everyone i know is losing their minds"

2009-04-25T00:19:00.003-04:00

thanks to the ever lovely hampton, who directed me to this blog -- Design Crush -- it has been really fun to keep up on this blog & i find myself being inspired on a daily basis.

threw some clicking, i found this blog -- ali loves curtis -- and the most recent post makes me want to bring my polaroid to work, or where ever the day leads me ...

i made pumpkin spice cupcakes with cream cheese icing, topped with coconut, and my favorite red velvet with cream cheese icing for my trainer's last day/weekend with us. he asked me if i was going to make cupcakes & i couldnt resit his request.

lately its been all about babies, babies, and more babies. im excited for my friends that are expecting but relieved that it is them and not me! our nephew aiden is growing so quickly and its been amazing to watch him change and grow!
what a great smile! so happy.
he's starting to stand all on his own and taking a few steps at a time, so proud.
and finally, kids when they are at their best! sleeping! which is what i need to be doing, but first the dishes.

"what?! you guys are still in bed!"

2009-04-21T10:01:00.002-04:00

last night i received a message from our dear friend joey bagofdonuts, he's in town! we last saw joey in FLA for less than 24hrs but it was some of the best moments of our trip.

i'm overly excited to see what the day brings us today in the city!

my only fear, my only hope, is letting go

2009-04-09T00:27:00.003-04:00

i just finished mine & pete's taxes for 2008 & we actually owed! so much for thinking, since we filed jointly that we would get something back, booo. i miss the days when you got everything back as a kid, and it was a nice big check you could use to purchase the item of your desire for that year.

finally finished the 2nd book in the twilight saga, new moon. it was very good & made me excited for the movie & to get started on the next book. i need to read more often, even if it just for pleasure because it really does soothes the soul.

one more thing, a girl i work with was talking about how she is excited that her family has finally excepted her and she is enjoying getting to know them. it made me think how often i take for granted that i grew up in a fairly normal situation and always had my families love & support no matter what. since moving to jersey i have gotten the amazing chance to get to know my grandma b better. i never really had the chance to form these sorts of bonds with any of my other grandparents because of distance or they passed before me. but i'm so thankful to have grandma b, and i know she feels the same about me.
i sometimes envy the time she grew up in, (its the whole born in the wrong decade thing) but i'm glad she always so willing to share!

there are a ton more things i want to blog about but the taxes wore me out & now im ready for bed. besides i think short & sweet blogs are better than long drawn out ramblings.

an unspoken balance here

2009-04-02T22:51:00.002-04:00

i am in love with this image.

i think mac did an excellent job on it, its uber photoshopped, but beautiful none the less!

i'm working on my time management skills, and filling my head/time with more important things to focus on. also, they are opening an LA Fitness by my house, and Bonez tells me there is gonna be a pool in there! i miss swimming, and if its true i might have to join and add some swimming to my walking routine.

one has nothing to do with the other

2009-03-31T14:46:00.005-04:00

when i have alot of days off in a row i find i get less done then when they are spread out. although i'm enjoying the time off, i can't help but feel anxious to get back to work. ( when i say i love my job, i truly mean it! )

over the past couple of months i have fallin' in love with post secret. i've made quite a few but i don't always mail them. sometimes once its out and made i feel better and let it go. i love this one because i can honestly say that it is true for me. when i see old pictures of my grandparents, or movies set in the 40's, i think "that is me & my time". apparently God didn't agree and here i am today but its fun to think about.

"if you could live forever? what would you live for?"

2009-03-26T23:05:00.004-04:00

if you didn't know, now you know. i loooove my cats. they are really like my children and the best part is that i don't have to parent much! of course they annoy pete & i on a daily basis, "meow, meow, meow", but we love them to pieces and would be crushed if anything happened to them.

baby girl (or bailey for vet purposes) likes to see what i am eating all the time. gets right in my bowl or plate. i know this may gross a few of you out, but don't worry i don't let her eat anything.
fritz on the other hand like to be were ever i am, including while i am getting ready for work. he will cry, cry, cry, & scratch till i let him in, and then he wants to sit with me. i must admit, i don't really mind that he wants to hangout with me, its only when he starts to play with the makeup or the flat iron that i get worried.
but they are our babies and we love them to death!

a couple of weeks ago alyne from work cut my bangs, and i am in love with them! i really missed having bangs, and now, with my hair getting so long it has been necessary to add some style. i'm thinking of cutting my hair?! not sure what, how, & when but its been over a year and it needs some love.

also, if you didn't know, now you know. green is my favorite color, and you can be pretty sure if it comes in green i want it. the color for the spring/summer season is green! i'm in love! mac came out with peppermint patti nail polish that i really need to get because i know it will sell out. it's super cute and since i've been on this nail polish kick, i figure i might has well wear a polish from the company i work for.

well, that's about it. nothing new and too exciting going on lately, but i figured i would share some tidbits ( i like blogging with visual aids, i'm sure all 2 of am readers would agree)! i'm just about finished reading the first twilight book, & i'm pretty impressed with myself because i've killed it, less than 3 days! i really enjoyed it and i'm excited to start the next one. i'm alittle embrassed that i like the whole series but i know i'm not alone.

baking until 1AM, its time to go to bed

2009-03-21T00:54:00.004-04:00

i made chocolate peanut butter cupcakes for one of the new girls at works birthday. the best part is that she isn't even working tomorrow! so, i'll have to make some more for next saturday. i sure know how to have a good time on a friday night ;)

tick tock tick tock tick tock tick tock

2009-03-19T22:39:00.002-04:00

i know that my come back to the world of blogging should really inform you on the recent goings ons in my life, but i'm not to sure of how to get this started again.

yesterday, while walking the mall (which is really funny for me to do because i work in a mall) pete and i found ourselves looking at phones, specifically the blackberry storm. verizon has that buy one, get one free deal going on, and pete is up for a new phone & really likes the blackberry pearl, so i've been tossing around the idea of getting the storm because, hey its a deal & i'm in love with the idea of having a smartphone. this morning i googled some reviews on the storm, and of course all i get is mixed reviews, people love it, people hate it, and they always compare it to the iphone. well in a perfect world verizon would have the iphone and my life would be complete! as i continued in my search for information on the storm i find out that apparently apple went to verizon first with the iphone and verizon turned it down! what?! what the gay?! i was crushed, because i could have an iphone right now and wouldn't be blogging about this, ugh! anyways, i know that deep down i really want the iphone, & i know that i would love it, so maybe in 2010 (when my agreement is up) i'll switch and get the new iphone that i'm sure will come out by then. but i'm not gonna lie, the BOGO deal is tempting, & at least it could hold me over until 2010.

what do you think?! which would you get?!

last week i finally saw twilight, and loved it! i wanted to read at least the first book before i saw the movie, but that never happened. i still want to read them, and im gonna try to do so before the next movie comes out *crosses fingers* but over all i loved the movie and im excited to see the rest of the series. the only thing i can say i didnt like was the silly faces that bella would make in the beginning of the movie, but that really wasnt a deal breaker for me.

alright, i think that is enough for now, soon i'll update with something more meaningful : )

up & running, soooooon

2009-03-19T11:50:00.002-04:00

so it's been quite sometime ... im working on coming back to this but it has absorbed to much of my time right now.

i wish my desktop was working, what i wouldnt give!

keep my feet on the ground

2008-12-17T01:29:00.002-05:00

i wish i knew what i wanted to say right now, its 1:30 in the AM and im up.

i've been planning my baking extravaganza for tomorrow and trying to map out the perfect schedule so i can get all i want done, done.

christmas is here and i keep thinking to myself "really?! i cant" but i have enjoyed my table top christmas tree and the pretty lights that keep the living room lit.

went to the dentist today after not going for 11 years. i didn't not go on purpose, it just worked out that way. turns out that the doc recommends that i have all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed. i know this is just a part of life and people do this all the time but i've never had surgery, ever and even the minor stuff kinda stresses me out. its also bad timing because i can't really take off from work, but im hoping maybe between christmas and new years, or maybe right after the first of the year i can get it done.

dear hampton,
i can't wait to see you my dear dear friend!
soon!
love you xoxo

the bed is calling my name, & tomorrow awaits!

time heals all

2008-11-02T20:47:00.004-05:00

today is the one year for the passing of pete's mom. its hard to believe its been a year. this time last year we never thought we would make it, but here we are, doing better than we ever thought. to honor her, we went to the grave of their grandmother and where his mom's ashes will be buried eventually. we cleaned up the weeds, added some mulch and made the area look nice. :)

the cemetery was found in 1776, so as crazy as it sounds we walked around looking for the oldest grave, the oldest we found was 1797. i know it must sound so morbid but there is so much life that is left with these small (or sometimes giant) markers. for me it made me wonder about the lives of all these people and even in the smallest way their life is not forgotten because we saw their name today.

later we had dinner at a great hole in the wall mexican place in pennsylvania and talked about jan and all the things we loved about her. its amazing how something so sad made us laugh today. my dad was right, death never gets easier, you just get use to it but the memories will change and what will remain are the good memories. he was so right because the weeks after her death were so hard and draining but now even though we wish it was different, we talk and laugh about her just like she is here and in a strange way it is comforting.

the emotion of today wasn't like i thought it would be. of course you have feeling of loss but love truly over shadows and brings us through.

"please, let the snow swallow the streets whole"

2008-10-29T01:12:00.004-04:00

today started out as a cold, cozy, rainy day. perfect for my day off this week! (and i seriously mean that) pete & i were on our way to feed dietz's cats while he's outta town & as we drove to his house the rain turned into a full blown snow storm! they shut down the highway and pete at one point got out of the car to push another person's car because he was stuck. we finally pulled off the icy highway to eat something and then headed home. To nothing! no snow, just rainy like we left it. truly bizarre ...

even though the weather was really strange, & as cheesy as it sounds, i really love hanging out with pete and had a great day today <3

its already here

2008-10-24T18:46:00.003-04:00

it's crazy to think that a year ago today we were celebrating your birthday and that would be the last time i would see you.

happy birthday!
love & miss you xoxo

cupcakes & tea

2008-10-18T00:43:00.002-04:00

you can smell the fall in my apartment tonight. its a perfect chilly snuggle kinda night ... to bad pete works nights!

i am hoping for a chance to walk in the park while the trees are still so colorful! silly schedules that get in the way of the best things!

goodnight.xoxo

time well spent

2008-10-12T22:16:00.002-04:00

ive been playing around with the layout, not sure i am in love with it but it will come to me ...

it turns out that zook is actually a girl not a boy like we thought. i keep debating on changing her name from zook to something like rue, but pete doesn't see the need to change her name. apparently zook is unisex!

barb, shella, and myself went to the food & wine festival in the city today. it was a lot of fun, and it give me some great inspiration to get cooking more often!

we saw 2 culinary demonstrations, Rocco DiSpirito & Masaharu Morimoto

both of them were really entertaining and alot of fun to watch. next year i wanna go see my girls giada and ina!

a friend of mine that i work with had a party in the city this past week for her clothing line, alumni ... the club was super cute and we had a good time : )

i have to say i work with some pretty awesome people and i am lucky to be right were i am at right now : )

if she moves like this, will you move like that?

2008-10-05T21:58:00.006-04:00

i have successfully done nothing all day! it was nice for most of the day but now i realize i have alot i want/should've done but now its semi-late and i just want to go to bed : )

we got a new kitten last monday and we are totally in love! originally we wanted an older cat because...
a.) most of the time people want kittens, not old "used" cats, and we feel they deserve a home just as much, if not more!
b.) fritz would take to an older cat better, because he is was best buds with max
c.) max had a very rare virus called FIP and fritz has the starter virus ( no worries, the corona virus is actually really common, its very rare that the corona virus develops into FIP ) and a cat that is at least 3 years old immune system is fully developed and has less of a chance of having the corona virus developing into FIP

well, pete's brother's co-worker's cat had kittens and he asked if we want/would take one, so of course we jumped on a free kitten!

meet syuk! (pronounced zuk)

we thought to name him re-max, haha, after max but felt that it wasn't fair for him to have to live up to who max was and that he deserved his own name. why syuk? well for pavel datsyuk of course! who is a center for the detriot red wings. so now its fritz & syuk, at first fritz was not happy but has warmed up to the little guy and now they like to wake me up in the morning with their running around!

i was alittle worried in the beginning that fritz was gonna hate us but he has returned to his cute loving self and best of all now he has a play mate.

in other ramblings ...
i can not believe it is october and the weather is amazing! wearing a hoodie is one of my top favorite things, seriously.
i am excited for halloween and i am trying to figure out what i want to do/be, any ideas would be kindly taken into consideration ... i am working that night and i want to be creative and fun!
i had a really crazy fun sleepless weekend with my girl april and some new friends (nikki & deandra). why must we live so far apart?!

my mama called me today and i said to her "things are good, nothing is perfect, but things are good" and it felt so nice to have a calm about my life and to have a sense of peace. of course there are things that need improvement but the more i am patitent, and the more i stop comparing, i see movement in the right direction in achieving the goals for myself and with pete.

now if i could only finish the paperwork to register to vote!

oh, i almost forgot that i wanted to share this ...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lFfNDFDUuA

m.a.c. certified!

2008-09-24T15:53:00.002-04:00

i am proud to say that i passed my make-up application certification today! it is nice to be rewarded for a job well done.

even fritz was proud of his mama.!

motivation, half the battle

2008-09-15T00:36:00.003-04:00

the weather has played a mean trick on me and now it is hot, humid, and sticky. oh, how i long for my apartment to be chilly and covered in multi colored leaves! i want to start making soups and chili but with the summer still lingering, who wants to eat hot soup?!

i'm afraid that i will keep putting off calling the local community college to see about taking some classes. i am promising myself to call tomorrow! promise!

she calls me from the cold

2008-09-12T08:35:00.003-04:00

i just heard the song "shimmer" while browsing my daily routine of sites. it's amazing how one sound can bring you back to what feels like a 100 years ago.

if only i knew then what i know now
isn't that how it always goes?!
but i feel certain that i wouldn't change a thing, just a few people's locations.!

the air outside feels and smells wonderful. i am so excited for the turning of leaves and wearing colorful scarves with my all-black uniform ... fall is my favorite season

9.7.08

2008-09-09T21:58:00.005-04:00

september 7th has come and gone but it is official, pete and i have been married for one full year! sometimes it is hard to believe that we made it, given some of the hands we have been dealt. but i am glad to be here and to be here with him. we went to the poconos mountains for a couple of days to celebrate and just get away from the daily grind. sometimes i forget how amazing God's creation is, but the reminder was wonderful!

i have tons of pictures to share, and a few other tidbits, but i haven't had the chance to upload the photos and have to work for the next 4 days. but soon, very soon!

here's to one year and infinity more ...

simple life

2008-08-18T19:19:00.003-04:00

i had big plans to blog today, pictures and everything ... but my computer has taken a nap, and hopefully hasn't died : (

i've had it for almost 5 years, i guess that is good for a desktop, but not good for our wallets.

i'm using pete's mom's laptop, and that will be good for now, just hope i don't fry this one too!

i've been wanting to simplify my life, this just might be a good start : )

it bugs me that i started every sentence in this blog with i

too much sugar & headaches

2008-08-01T10:07:00.003-04:00

i made cupcakes at 11PM last night. i was trying to practice for when i make them for april's engagement party. they didn't turn out quite as i hoped but overall i think its a good start.

i must admit that some of them do look like sunny side up eggs, but practice makes perfect! & besides they taste amazing! you can't go wrong with red velvet & cream cheese icing, yum!

my folks will be here tonight! CORRECTION: i just got off the phone with my mama, & they will be here in an hour! i am super excited to see them and even though i have the worst possible schedule at work, i luckly only have one bella meeting and all day sunday to hangout. i haven't seen them since the wedding and i really miss them, it will be a really well needed visit.

and as if you didn't see enough of fritz ... since we don't have babies yet, he's our baby and we are very proud of him!

off to work!

bed time!

2008-07-26T01:00:00.001-04:00

Aidan Dietrick Wortmann entered the world on Thursday! July 24th 2008! It was truly an amazing experience and he is sooooo beautiful!

However, I cannot lie, it does make me feel the "want" to have a baby. Between all my friends on Facebook having babies and seeing Aidan yesterday, the mama in me is peeking through! Pete and I have no plans to have a baby anytime soon but after seeing Aidan, we both can't wait to experience such great love!

Other news, I was promoted at work last week! I am now a full-time make-up artist for MAC Cosmetics. Part-time wasn't cutting it and this is going to be such a nice relief on the bills. MAC is by far the best cosmetic line I've worked for and the most satifying as well. It's just nice to be respected for my talent, be busy with customers and really perfecting my craft. I'm surrounded by so maybe talented artist that it has only made me better and love my job even more. As far as the Bella Pictures goes, I really do enjoy it but just doesn't seem to be worth all the extra effort and time that I've had to put in. I am going to cut my availability for meetings way down in the month of August to see if that helps alittle. I suppose I am disappointed because I don't want to quit because I do enjoy meeting the brides and talking wedding. But at least I have a job and now that I am full-time I feel alittle more secure about our money situation.

Also, I recently came in contact with my half-brother, Johnny. God Bless Myspace! If you didn't know that my Dad wasn't my biological father, now you know! On my bio-logical father's side, he had 3 kids before me, 2 brothers and a sister. It is all very exciting but at the same time very overwhelming, but I really feel like there is a purpose to all of this. At first I was alittle nervous that I opened a can of worms but I've been pleasantly surprised that they are just as curious about me, as I've been about them all these years. Not to say that the family I knew before this wasn't good enough, but now it's just extended! I feel that only good can come from this!

I think I've mentioned this before, but I am thinking about going back to school. Yet, again! I want to go back for what I should have always done 5 years ago, Teaching. I am not sure about what I would want to teach but I am leaning towards Jr. High or High School, maybe History?! Everything in my life seems to be pointing in that direction and I feel some what peaceful that even know I am very unsure on how I am going to go back to school or even pay for it! I feel at peace, as if I have finally realized what I am good at, and what I want to do. I love doing make-up and make-up will always be apart of my life from now on, however I feel that maybe MAC is going to be my way to get to the ultimate goal. I've always tried to be someone else and run away from what comes naturally to me but this time I am gonna grab a hold of what I know in my heart is what God has for me.

Lastly, I saw this verse tattooed on the bride I met today ... Galations 6:17 " From now on, let no one make troubles for me; for I bear the marks of Jesus on my body." ... I've thought to tattoo a couple of bible verses on my wrist, but I've waited because I feel that wrist tattoos can be kinda trendy now a days, but this verse really struck a cord with me and has me thinking ... : )

That's quite enough for now dontcha thing?! I am so cool to be blogging on a Friday night. But I am excited to get to bed and cuddle with Petey Pie!<3

i have a planet on my nose

2008-07-24T00:04:00.002-04:00

there is alot i have to blog about

but my thoughts keep jumping around and i can't seem to focus

however! little baby aidan ( my new nephew ) will be here tomorrow! & i can't wait to meet him!!

i'll blog tomorrow!

i loooooooove money!

2008-07-13T13:39:00.003-04:00

maybe the best show of the summer until heroes starts up in september!

pete & i could not get enough of this show! vh1 scored with this!

every minute is OK

2008-07-09T23:23:00.002-04:00

i've had all night to cruise the world wide web & blog but instead i wait until 11:30 PM to surf because i have to be awake at 5:30 AM

why so early in the AM?!?! tomorrow i have update for mac in the city. of course i love the city & i oh so love mac pro ... a good time will be had!

+

=

(borrowed from hampton)

i really need, ok want, to take more & more pictures. i feel to the need to document things more. i am gonna start that tomorrow!

i've had the past 2 days off and it has been wonderfully lovely! of course i had a list of things to do & only completed maybe 1/3 of what was on that list, but i feel i was successful none the less. finally used my slow cooker! made an awesome steak & amazing turkey burgers! did 3 weeks worth of laundry! got rid of some clutter! & kept the sink free of dishes! (which is HUGE!)

as my music taste evolves, i find myself loving more & more of this catchy indie with a techo dance vibe. anything i feel i could dance to is good for me! lately (meaning the past 2 days ) i've been listening to this russian indie band called punkTV.

lame name, but they are russian & that for some reason makes it better : ) the song "every minute is OK" has been on loop for 2 days now, its a good fake piano playing tune. i couldn't find a youtube thing to post, but if you check out my myspace , the song is on my profile. you will love it! i hope http://www.myspace.com/bekahlikewhoa

now that it is 11:53 PM & i need to wake up @ 5:30 AM i think it's safe to say i need to go to bed. g'nite!

look alikes

2008-07-03T13:42:00.001-04:00

the past 2 mornings i have made some amazing french toast, amazing!

even though i haven't seen you in years, yours is the funeral i would fly to from anywhere

2008-06-26T23:02:00.009-04:00

i've just had a flood of inspiration come my way ... i am awake and ready to take them on!

so i've been working on my halloween face charts (yes, they want a halloween face chart in june) this is really just a rough draft because the more i look at it, i see something different but the same idea. liquesa didn't like it because it reminded her of a beaten' woman, but that wasn't what i was going for. i was actually inspired by pete's halloween costume a year or two ago, you know the hockey puck lodged in his forehead ;

get ready for the final copy, soon : )

this could quite possibly be the best christmas gift i've ever received, and don't be surprised if, you, my readers, all 3 of you, get this in the mail come january 2009! oh! & don't steal this idea & get it for yourself, you'll just spoil my plan!

but i've never been a gotta get a magazine kinda girl. i like to pick up the occasional gossip magazine, a fashion magazine here & there for a plane rides, but besides being 13 & walking to the winn dixie to get the new copy of BOP, it's never been my thing. my girl, nickky got this for me for christmas & not only is it amazing but the best gift ever! i have never learned so much or put so much to good use from reading a magazine! i carry it around in my bag all month, & then pass it on to barb when i get the next months!

we still have yet to get a friend for fritz. i feel so guilty when we leave him all by himself : ( but until we get the ok from the vet, we wait ... in the meantime we found maybe the cutest breed we've ever seen. the best part is that it comes in russian blue! they are called scottish folds, and i am in love! i looked on pet finder to see if there were any in our area, but there isn't or at least they aren't listed. but either way, whether we get a russian blue or a scottish fold, all we want is to give a nice kitty a home, & one who is a good match for fritz & us

how can you not love that face?! although, those worried eyes might freak me out late at night when i am home alone!

i am wired right now, and before i lose steam i am gonna go clean the kitchen, fold laundry, & wash my face ... i am waking up early to make lemon & basil eggs over foccacia

yum!

somethings are just true

2008-06-22T19:57:00.002-04:00

maybe the coolest fortune cookie ever!

seriously, no joke! amazing!

pete, barb, shella, and myself did The Great Urban Race in NYC yesterday! truly a LOT of fun! it's somewhat like the The Amazing Race, but it is one day in one city. i have pictures, but i will upload them sometime tomorrow?! maybe tuesday! : )

silly silly silly

2008-06-19T21:11:00.002-04:00

i like doing face charts. i need to start taking pictures of the faces i do! i did 2 amazing make-up's today ...

i color for a living

2008-06-11T21:55:00.005-04:00

a successful face chart 6/9/08 ... im working on my lashes, & in real life the colors look so much more vivid, but i think it's not bad for a newbie ...

if you would have asked me 5 years ago if i was gonna be a make-up artist and live in new jersey, i would have laughed!
stranger things have happened i suppose :)

"love is watching someone die ..."

2008-06-11T00:53:00.003-04:00

im obsessed with these two songs ...

"what sarah said" - death cab for cutie
maybe the saddest song i've ever heard but i can't get enough of it

"my only offer" - mates of state
what an amazing new album! & maybe the cutest married couple ever

the heat wave is killing me ... i'm melting!

shoot on sight

2008-06-04T02:16:00.005-04:00

lots & lots to do! must be productive; i will be productive!

i seriously have to write down to tell pete something or i would forget

don't mind the misspellings, it's just the way it is ya know

my memory isn't what it use to be,
or maybe i just have more things to fill up my time

can't wait!

2008-05-29T23:22:00.003-04:00

but i am gonna wait until next week! maybe like wednesday afternoon : )

i would have to say i am most like carrie typical
however! i do find that i've identified with all them at one time or another

yes, but its not so bad

2008-05-28T21:39:00.003-04:00

so it has been quite sometime & to be honest the only reason i can give for the delay is the fact that i just haven't been in the mood to blog. but i do enjoy reading my friend's blogs!

since my last post, pete & i lost our kitty max : ( you would have thought we lost a child. i know that to some it might seem silly but max was amazing & truly the 4 of us were & are a family. max had a rare feline disease called F.I.P., basically his body was producing a toxic fluid that just built up & his body could no longer fight it off.
you had never met a more chill, cool cat. he was a great opposite for fritz, & they got along just like brothers. we got max right after we got married & we never thought that he wouldn't make it through our first year & just be 2 yrs old but i would never change anything about adopting max, i just wish he was still here.

fritz at first wasn't himself without his buddy but now he seems to be doing alright & being the normal crazy fritz! we have talked and even looked for a new kitty friend for fritz but we need to make sure that fritz isn't infected with F.I.P. because i couldn't bare to keep losing our kitties. the disease is extremely rare but we would rather be safe than sorry. he has is yearly check up in a few weeks, we'll find out then.

love & miss you, max

things have been nice (besides max of course) & moving right along. we signed on to our lease for another year and we are thinking of maybe purchasing a home in the next 2 years, thinking ... i feel like pete & i are getting to a point in our relationship/marriage where we have worked through some of the more major kinks and learned how to communicate with each other in a positive way to address the kinks and make a change. i know that it will never be perfect, but learning how to fight is kinda fun, and definitely eye opening for the 2 of us.

work is nice. i really love doing alot of make up and learning from the amazing artist that i am surrounded by everyday. my skill level has improved ten folds in 6 weeks and i can't wait to get better! bella is also going well and i really have been enjoying something extra on the side. there has been a balance issue, but i am figuring that out.

as my ramblings continue ... my body has changed and not in a nice way. the problem is that i know there is a lack of motivation but all i feel is discouraged. dietz was awesome enough to give me his gazelle and i have used it but i really need to use it more! haha i also need to go grocery shopping so we don't keep ordering out. maybe tomorrow!

i know for sure tomorrow that i will be going to grandma b's. pete & i got her cable so she can watch poker and i am super excited for her! she doesn't know it yet & i hope she doesn't get up set haha but i think she will really like it. she had her 83rd birthday last week and we had a nice bbq for her. she is amazing & i feel so blessed to be able to have this relationship we have.

red lips & heels never go outta style.

hmmm, what else?! pete's (or i suppose i could say our) pittsburg pengins are in the stanley cup finals! its been excited to see them get this far but right now they are behind 2-0 in the series. game 3 is on right now and they are up 3 - 2 but there is still alot of hockey to be played! but i am enjoying every step of the adventure!

LET'S GO PENS!!

that is all for now, i really wanna try and keep up on this. i feel it will help to organize my thoughts.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRITZ!!! 1 years old!

2008-04-22T11:08:00.004-04:00

Baby Fritz!When we first got you : )

& now!

but, we love you!

Happy Birthday! : )

talking like turnstiles

2008-04-08T22:06:00.003-04:00

hampdawg tagged me to share 7 random facts about myself, so for all 3 of you that read my blog here ya go : )

1. i seriously love milk. i actually get thirsty for it. i feel that a big plate of spaghetti with meat sauce & a nice tall cold glass of milk is perfection! 1% please! no skim!

2. i struggle with low self-esteem. most people i meet and that i don't have a deeply intense relationship with would never know it but it is true. i question about everything i do and really get upset about what people think about me. alot of times it hinders me from doing what i really want to do & warps my reality on certain situations. i know it is lame and i feel that as i grow older it has gotten better but i still struggle with it.

3. i've never been the homesick type but i really do miss my folks and friends back in texas. i love pete & jersey but texas will always be home!

4. i say motherfucker probably more than i should & generally people jump on the bandwagon when they are around me. haha, i'm such a good influence : )

5. i love the food network, when i turn the tv on i always go to channel 29! and before there was a food network i use to LOVE watching the cooking shows on the discovery channel during the day, whether i skipped school or during summer break : ) ... i feel that it has paid off because my cooking skills have improved so much!

6. in high school, every saturday night i would stay up late and watch g-rock on TBN ( the lady with the big purple hair, i wonder if that channel is still exist?! we don't get it on the east coast) ... i was cool in high school haha : )

7. i don't bite my nails, i actually break them. i bend them until they crack and then i rip them off ... eww! it sounds alot more gross then it really is but i do it when i am bored or nervous. when i get a manicure it isn't has bad but i can't afford them on a weekly basis! even though i probably should because of my job. maybe i will re-work the budget : )

there you go! i really don't have anyone to tag : ( but i will try and come back to it!

ps. got a new job! actually 2 new jobs! one as a photography consultant for bella pictures, so if you or someone you know need wedding photography, let me know! and the second, i am now a mac make-up artist! need your make-up done?! call me! nice plug

that is all ...

at the top of the list, apparently

2008-03-04T23:13:00.002-05:00

youtube has become a huge love of mine. i can't stop laughing about the sarah silverman video about f**king matt damon ... "on the bed, on the floor, on a towel by the door, in the tub, in the car, up against the mini-bar" ... i am LOLing as i type & as you read! jimmy kimmel's response is also funny but matt damon's performance makes it. but i have also found some very talented people with amazing make-up videos & i am just soaking up all the goodness.

went to bingo tonight, always good times with grandma b. she won $15 bucks and then gave me $5, i suppose for my birthday on friday. i was waiting for I 25 to win $222, and what do they call? I 27 and someone yells "BINGO" : ( but spending time with grandma b is always cherished & i'm very lucky to still have her around.

patiences is starting to come easier.
i am still very eager but doing the best i can in the mean time.

shock & awe

2008-02-18T21:10:00.003-05:00

i suppose i've been more bummed before,
although it's not often that people don't remember me.

let it settle for the night, & move forward tomorrow.

patiences.

retaliate first!

2008-02-15T23:13:00.003-05:00

this might sound weird, but bare with me.

things are always changing, whether i initiate it or not, things are always changing.

there is something that i want & i know, i just know it would be perfect for me. but time is moving right along & i have yet to get that thing i want. patiences is not a virtue of mine & the waiting game is really starting to wear me out. but i push forward knowing that it's bound to happen, no matter the out come. sorry to be vague, but i share so much of myself on a daily basic, i feel the need to attempt to be mysterious even if the only people that read this already know : )

my mind is always wondering and always thinking. i'm finding right now that i need to focus on the things i am learning, and how i am going to use these new "skills" in my ever changing life.

1. i talk to much, i let to much be known, & it always comes back to me. 9 times outta 10, it is not intentional.
2. i don't value the present as much as i should. i spend too much time wondering and worrying about the things to come that is stalls me to take care of today.
3. i do not give myself the credit,when credit is due & often have a pity party for myself.

it's amazing to me how we come to these conculsions, because all mine took was one make-up application & one great phone conversation with a lovely customer. i am good at what i do, and even though i might never be the best, i am here to learn & enjoy. and i must remember that the grass is not always greener on the other side.

i know this more than likely doesn't make sense but it feels good to let it out & share it. ( thank heaven for blogs! )

i've been watching a large amount of youtube, and it has been the quite the inspiration for me lately. i need to let my creativity flow and let all of my thoughts, worries, and wonders go into what ever i do. whether it be make up, decorating our house, cooking, or just putting pictures in frames, i need to let it all out and know i am just as good as the people i admire!

.......... !

dontcha know that it is insane

2008-02-11T13:43:00.000-05:00

i feel like my insides are about to bust! i cannot wait any longer!

please! oh, please! my LG VX9800! Vibrate!

must purchase a duster*

2008-01-25T23:41:00.000-05:00

this really made me LOL & i will have to try it one day! ( just like showering in a model home! )

i am so ready for monday because i am going to die soon, from over thinking EVERYTHING, like usual. although wedensday gave me hope!

odds & ends held together with safety pins

2008-01-09T22:38:00.000-05:00

i really have so much i want to say and do right now but i am just to lazy to put it in a blog : )

i am however very glad not to be sick anymore ( pukin' & poopin' all that the same time), and sorry that pete is now the sick one : ( that is what happens when you share a bed! ( he'll be better soon :) )

left or right?

2008-01-02T08:35:00.000-05:00

i am at a crossroads.

i need to stick this out!

2007-12-21T23:40:00.000-05:00

my love for smashbox has grown ... now if only my business would grow! it's a work in progress

Smashbox presents Green Room, a health- and environment conscious makeup collection. With every purchase of a Smashbox Green Room product, a Moringa tree will be planted in a developing country by Trees for the Future. The Moringa aka Miracle Tree is a self-renewing food source for people in need. More trees also mean less soil erosion and cleaner air and water. All Green Room packaging is biodegradable or recyclable and its products are environmentally friendly.

the collection is truly beautiful & i am always about supporting a good cause! so if you want to purchase anything, contact me! haha but seriously, i need all the help i can get!

finding this at my counter made my day!

"cause if it's ever gonna get any better ... it's gotta get worse for a day!"

2007-12-20T09:41:00.000-05:00

one day i will log in to our bank account & not have that gut wrenching feeling . one day!

my head is a giant mush of everything & i really wish i could just take it easy & not let so much effect me.

although (looking on the bright side) i did wake up at a decent time & i have already accomplished 3 things on my list and i am finishing up the 4th one while i type.

no gut wrenching feeling for the rest of the day!

i am missing an "N"

2007-11-20T08:18:00.000-05:00

these past weeks have been tough, long, and really just unbelievable. its amazing how much our lives can change with just one phone call & a few words. it feels weird to move forward and try to be "normal" ... i can honestly say i had no idea how much this has impacted me, and i suppose you never really know until it happens.

( i changed my name, and i am almost! there. the social security office misspelled my new last name and now i have to go back this morning. i am really hoping to get in & out. )

even though death is harder for the living, i feel new adventures are on the horizon! and we have a greater appreciation for all that is around us!

we love you & miss you!

2007-11-10T09:47:00.000-05:00

May the road rise to meet you

May the wind be always at your back

May the sun shine warm upon your face

The rains fall soft upon your fields

And until we meet again

May God hold you In the palm of His hand.

Mama Wortmann

October 24th 1940 - November 2nd 2007

saving & learning

2007-10-31T00:29:00.001-04:00

i can NOT wait to put this into action!

next week ... it is ON!

done & done

2007-10-24T09:36:00.000-04:00

i lack motivation & it's really starting to erk me.

but i am trying, honest!

my list of things that need to happen & i want to happen is growing, growing, growing!

getter done!

responsablity, what's that?

2007-10-21T22:30:00.000-04:00

time management

&

organization

have never my strong points

(i feel so lazy, & not in a fun, enjoyable, good way.)

scheduling problems

2007-10-09T09:03:00.000-04:00

forgot to ask barb to tape heros last night. thats the last time i close on a monday! (although closing is alot of fun with the right crew, & i always seem to luck out!)

next week i have monday off!

pete remembered to ask barb!
watched heros tonight & it was pure greatness
per-usual.